hella_bunyip

Forgive me friends for I have blogged

2007-03-29T06:10:06Z

It has been 6 months since my last digression :(

We have a new baby on the way, Janey framed one of the ultrasound pictures and put it on the wall. The baby is due in July. We're going to move Toby into his own room in the next month or two so he's got time to get used to it rather than being rudely displaced when the baby comes.

I started riding to the station a couple of weeks ago to get a bit of exercise and also save some money on transport (I ride into Zone 1). The most direct route feels very unsafe so I found a longer one that is mostly paths and service lanes. Last week I got a puncture, though, and when I took it to the bike shop they pointed out all my broken spokes and rust and anyway I bought a new one, plus some lights and a rain jacket. I will feel spending guilt for the next few weeks.

I'm coming off the project I've been doing so I've found myself with some free time, which I've spent studying for a Microsoft certification. This week I decided to be all teenagery so I joined facebook and did this thing, which I will hide behind a cut because it is lame.

Apparently if you have seen more than 85 films from this list you have no life, according to the people that spent their time compiling 239 movies to put on the list. I have seen 97 films so I have no life and also Corey is totally hot and Brandi is such a bitch.

(x) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(x) Grease
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
(x) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
( ) Starsky and Hutch
(x) Neverending Story
(x) Blazing Saddles
( ) Airplane
Total so far: 8

(x) The Princess Bride
( ) AnchorMan
( ) Napoleon Dynamite
(x) Labyrinth
( ) Saw
( ) Saw II
( ) White Noise
( ) White Oleander
( ) Anger Management
( ) 50 First Dates
( ) The Princess Diaries
( ) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
Total so far: 10

(x) Scream
( ) Scream 2
( ) Scream 3
(x) Scary Movie
( ) Scary Movie 2
( ) Scary Movie 3
( ) Scary Movie 4
(x) American Pie
( ) American Pie 2
( ) American Wedding
( ) American Pie Band Camp
Total so far: 13

(x) Harry Potter 1
(x) Harry Potter 2
(x) Harry Potter 3
(x) Harry Potter 4
(x) Resident Evil 1
( ) Resident Evil 2
(x) The Wedding Singer
( ) Little Black Book
(x) The Village
( ) Lilo & Stitch
Total so far: 20

(x) Finding Nemo
(x) Finding Neverland
(x) Signs
( ) The Grinch
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
( ) White Chicks
(x) Butterfly Effect
( ) 13 Going on 30
(x) I, Robot
( ) Robots
Total so far: 25

( ) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
( ) Universal Soldier
(x) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
( ) Along Came Polly
(x) Deep Impact
( ) KingPin
( ) Never Been Kissed
(x) Meet The Parents
( ) Meet the Fockers
( ) Eight Crazy Nights
( ) Joe Dirt
(x) KING KONG
Total so far: 29

( ) A Cinderella Story
(x) The Terminal
( ) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Passport to Paris
(x) Dumb & Dumber
( ) Dumber & Dumberer
( ) Final Destination
( ) Final Destination 2
( ) Final Destination 3
(x) Halloween
(x) The Ring
( ) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving X-MAS
( ) Flubber
Total so far: 34

( ) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
( ) Practical Magic
(x) Chicago
( ) Ghost Ship
(x) From Hell
(x) Hellboy
( ) Secret Window
( ) I Am Sam
( ) The Whole Nine Yards
( ) The Whole Ten Yards
Total so far: 37

(x) The Day After Tomorrow
( ) Child's Play
( ) Seed of Chucky
( ) Bride of Chucky
(x) Ten Things I Hate About You
( ) Just Married
( ) Gothika
( ) Nightmare on Elm Street
( ) Sixteen Candles
( ) Remember the Titans
( ) Coach Carter
( ) The Grudge
( ) The Grudge 2
(x) The Mask
( ) Son Of The Mask
Total so far: 39

( ) Bad Boys
( ) Bad Boys 2
( ) Joy Ride
( ) Lucky Number Sleven
(x) Ocean's Eleven
( ) Ocean's Twelve
(x) Bourne Identity
( ) Bourne Supremecy
( ) Lone Star
(x) Bedazzled
(x) Predator I
(x) Predator II
(x) The Fog
( ) Ice Age
( ) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
( ) Curious George
Total so far: 45

(x) Independence Day
(x) Cujo
( ) A Bronx Tale
( ) Darkness Falls
( ) Christine
(x) ET
( ) Children of the Corn
( ) My Bosses Daughter
( ) Maid in Manhattan
(x) War of the Worlds
(x) Rush Hour
(x) Rush Hour 2
Total so far: 51

( ) Best Bet
( ) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
( ) She's All That
( ) Calendar Girls
( ) Sideways
( ) Mars Attacks
(x) Event Horizon
(x) Ever After
(x) Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump
( ) Big Trouble in Little China
(x) The Terminator
(x) The Terminator 2
(x) The Terminator 3
Total so far: 58

(x) X-Men
(x) X-2
( ) X-3
(x) Spider-Man
(x) Spider-Man 2
( ) Sky High
( ) Jeepers Creepers
( ) Jeepers Creepers 2
( ) Catch Me If You Can
(x) The Little Mermaid
(x) Freaky Friday
( ) Reign of Fire
( ) The Skulls
(x) Cruel Intentions
( ) Cruel Intentions 2
( ) The Hot Chick
(x) Shrek
(x) Shrek 2
Total so far: 67

( ) Swimfan
( ) Miracle on 34th street
( ) Old School
( ) The Notebook.
( ) K-Pax
( ) Krippendorf's Tribe
(x) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castles
( ) Boogeyman
( ) The 40-year-old Virgin
Total so far: 68

(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring
(x) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
(x) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
(x) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
(x) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
(x) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Total so far: 74

( ) Baseketball
( ) Hostel
( ) Waiting for Guffman
( ) House of 1000 Corpses
( ) Devils Rejects
( ) Elf
(x) Highlander
( ) Mothman Prophecies
(x) American History X
( ) Three
Total so Far: 77

( ) The Jacket
( ) Kung Fu Hustle
( ) Shaolin Soccer
( ) Night Watch
(x) Monsters Inc.
(x) Titanic
(x) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
(x) Shaun Of the Dead
( ) Willard
Total so far: 81

( ) High Tension
( ) Club Dread
(x) Hulk
( ) Dawn Of the Dead
(x) Hook
(x) Chronicles Of Narnia The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
( ) 28 days later
( ) Orgazmo
( ) Phantasm
(x) Waterworld
Total so far: 85

(x) Kill Bill vol 1
(x) Kill Bill vol 2
( ) Mortal Kombat
( ) Wolf Creek
( ) Kingdom of Heaven
( ) The Hills Have Eyes
( ) I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
( ) The Last House on the Left
( ) Re-Animator
(x) Army of Darkness
Total so far: 88

(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(x) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
(x) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(x) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
(x) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
( ) Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
( ) Ewoks The Battle For Endor
Total so far: 94

(x) The Matrix
(x) The Matrix Reloaded
(x) The Matrix Revolutions
(x) Animatrix
( ) Evil Dead
( ) Evil Dead 2
( ) Team America: World Police
( ) Red Dragon
(x) Silence of the Lambs
( ) Hannibal

TOTAL: 97

Now I will make big lists of all the music and movies I like so that people will know how awesome I am and I will get internet friends by the bucketload. Bill Gates will notice me and send me money for making computers cooler.

HELO JOURNAL FRENDS

2006-09-19T01:33:49Z

I got a 10% payrise from "not nearly enough" to "not quite enough", so now I have to figure out what to do next. Our tax returns came in just in time for the water bill, car insurance, etc. I also got the second part of "family tax benefit" which I put straight on the mortgage (we can redraw as required: this is great). We should be fine for the next couple of months but I want to put a budget together and make sure it's workable for the long term. The project I was working on is winding up (though I still keep getting work to do) and it looked like I'd be moving on to a "support team" but now there's another possible project for which I need to provide an updated CV and meet the clients on Friday.

In any case, I'm taking next week off to do stuff around the house. I made an off-the-top-of-my-head list of things that need doing and it has 26 things on it.

Janey is doing her flute exam next month, on the day before Toby's birthday. She's just about entirely convinced that she won't pass, but that's not for lack of effort since she's been practising constantly since the last exam. My role is just to try and reduce her stress in the meantime.

Toby can clap and wave and is learning to stand by himself. He is an unending source of entertainment.

SUMPTUOUS HELLOES

2006-07-05T01:23:31Z

Janey's cat died. :(

He officially belongs to us (Janey saved him from being drowned as a kitten when she was living in the country), but he was living with Janey's grandfather down in Geelong until such time as Pop could no longer look after him. But he got mauled by a dog. Apparently the dog also attacked a person so the cat is going to be used as evidence. O_O

VALE BULLBAR

Of course my aunt also died, which is a far more significant event, but we knew that was coming. She had cancer everywhere and lasted a lot longer and in more comfort than was expected. Anyway mum's pretty sad right now and Dad's just headed off to a conference in Wales, so we're trying to make sure she gets to see Toby reasonably often as he is good therapy.

Janey's mum is going to use Pop's money to buy him a digital TV and video recorder. I'm not exactly sure why, as I'm sure Pop has no particular desire for either of these things. I suspect she just likes buying things. We've been offered his old TV which is itself only a couple of years old and perfectly good. I think it may even have been a previous mum purchase. It's probably better than ours for watching movies so if we can find a taker for our current TV we might go for the upgrade. If not, I'm happy to keep ours: there's no way we need TWO of them. I'm guessing Janey's brother might want Pop's for when he moves out and if so he's welcome.

I've found you can manufacture a sense of achievement in your leisure time by making lists of entertainment and ticking things off as you consume them. Computer games track progress internally so you don't need to make a list for those, but I've got lists of books, music, movies and TV shows. Hooray, my life is Progress Quest! I also have a list of actual things I have to DO, but it's been sadly neglected lately. This is partly because we don't have any actual money, but I talked to the guy I think is my manager at the moment about a raise and he agreed that this would be A Good Thing. Now I have to judge what's the appropriate intervals to wait before a) continually reminding him (also how to do this without wheedling) and b) giving up and finding another job.

I've started going to a Blockbuster near work to get the occasional weekly rental as they have a much better selection than our local stores. This means I can go back to gradually whittling away at the aforementioned movie list. We've seen A Very Long Engagement, Waking Life and Nausicaa so far. We also figure we're due for a "real" movie and so I think I'll have to choose between Superman Returns and Pirates 2. Janey's been to see The Break-up twice with different mother's groups but it's not something she'd choose to see otherwise.

Toby greets me with wide eyes when I get home in the evenings and comes crawling over at top speed. Last night he added unearthly hooting to the procedure. I have never known someone to be so impressed with the act of walking through a door. I hope it will not be too much of a shock to him when he realises we are not perfect heavenly beings.

hella_bunyip @ 2006-03-07T09:45:00

2006-03-06T23:32:13Z

TECHNOLOGY
[08:49] Bunyip: blararg
[08:49] Bunyip: the internet stopped updating
[08:49] Spork: waaaagh
[08:49] Bunyip: all of it
[08:49] Spork: time stood still in a moment
[08:50] Bunyip: so it's time for more classic times with sporky
[08:50] Bunyip: tymes, even
[08:50] Bunyip: classick tymes
[08:50] Spork: do.. do you want me to get out my dried herbs?
[08:50] Spork: i have some oregano..
[08:51] Bunyip: :(

LINGUISTICS
[08:51] Bunyip: "please enter your access code"
[08:51] Bunyip: "invalid access code"
[08:51] Bunyip: i have forgotten my code
[08:52] Spork: is it 0000
[08:52] Bunyip: worth a shot
[08:52] Bunyip: no :(
[08:52] Bunyip: that's two frownies already and it's not even 9 o'clock yet
[08:53] Spork: i fear for your sanity if you have to use three
[08:53] Bunyip: o'clock is such a deliciously archaic word
[08:53] Bunyip: i love the thought that americans are using o'clock without even thinking about it
[08:53] Spork: if they had any idea, they'd try and put a z in it
[08:54] Bunyip: yes :(
[08:54] Bunyip: crap 3
[08:54] Spork: nooo

LOGISTICS
[08:54] Bunyip: i should try to find out who my manager is today
[08:55] Bunyip: as penance
[08:56] Bunyip: ok manager candidate no 1 is not at work yet
[08:57] Spork: why do you get there so early
[08:57] Bunyip: because public transport is more bearable if i go early
[08:57] Bunyip: also i hate leaving late
[08:58] Bunyip: if i leave 5 minutes later in the morning, i get to work like half an hour later
[08:58] Spork: do you get paid more to be there early?
[08:58] Bunyip: no
[08:58] Bunyip: but i get to leave at 5
[08:58] Bunyip: also the later i leave the more disgusting schoolkids are on the bus
[08:59] Spork: that is a critical conclusion there

BIOLOGY
[08:59] Bunyip: DISGUSTING WORMY TEENAGERS
[08:59] Spork: full of..
[08:59] Spork: worms
[08:59] Bunyip: so many worms
[08:59] Spork: i know i was dripping with them
[08:59] Spork: then on my 20th they just seemed to drop out
[09:00] Bunyip: it is advisable to hold 20th birthday parties on plastic
[09:00] Spork: yeah the cleanup would've been easier
[09:00] Bunyip: because blort
[09:00] Spork: luckily, i was on the toilet at the exact time of my birth
[09:00] Spork: because i like to time these things
[09:00] Spork: keep up "heavy expellations" on time
[09:00] Spork: as an anniversary
[09:01] Bunyip: it's worth celebrating these occasions
[09:01] Spork: heck if i don't, no-one will
[09:02] Bunyip: more fool them

CURRENT EVENTS
[09:03] Bunyip: ok, today's news!
[09:03] Bunyip: Tens of thousands of protesters in Bangkok, Thailand demand the resignation of Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra.
[09:03] Bunyip: i was just looking in our address book and noticing how cool all the thai names are
[09:03] Bunyip: (we have a thailand branch)
[09:04] Bunyip: i wonder if Narin Limsamphanchareon and Narumon Amatasawatdee are at the protests
[09:07] Spork: maybe they are being protested for having too long names
[09:07] Spork: did you think of that
[09:07] Bunyip: i did not!
[09:08] Bunyip: the PM is Thaksin Shinawatra, perhaps he is being protested for having a name too short
[09:09] Spork: aaah
[09:09] Spork: maybe if he added a few extra letters then all of this could be solved
[09:09] Spork: shinawatrahanceon
[09:09] Spork: shinawatruncheon
[09:10] Bunyip: woah, check out the king's name
[09:10] Bunyip: Bhumibol Adulyadej
[09:10] Bunyip: no wonder he is king
[09:10] Bunyip: i am awed
[09:12] Bunyip: i should update wikipedia
[09:12] Bunyip: Critics have accused him of insider trading and structuring the deal to avoid paying hefty taxes, among other irregularities.
[09:12] Bunyip: ...including his relatively uninteresting name
[09:12] Spork: his name starts "bum"
[09:13] Spork: that will never be uninteresting
[09:13] Bunyip: no, i meant the pm
[09:13] Bunyip: the king's not getting protested
[09:13] Bunyip: how could you protest a bhumibol
[09:13] Spork: oooh
[09:14] Spork: i know i couldn't
[09:14] Spork: it'd go against my every essence
[09:14] Bunyip: you'd be all "JUSTICE FOR THE POOR" and they'd be "here is king bhumibol" and i'd be "oh shit your highness i am ever so sorry"
[09:15] Bunyip: i swapped you for i there
[09:15] Bunyip: it got personal
[09:15] Bunyip: i couldn't distance myself from the story
[09:15] Bunyip: my rivals at the paper were correct
[09:15] Spork: you are too much of a renegade i fear
[09:15] Bunyip: I am guilty .. OF CARING TOO MUCH
[09:17] Spork: you will be a great mother one day
[09:17] Bunyip: if only!

NOMENCLATURE
[09:17] Bunyip: i never thought i'd get addicted to wikipedia
[09:18] Spork: i guess it's better to be addicted to wikipedia than porno
[09:18] Bunyip: you can look at wikipeida at work
[09:18] Bunyip: wikipedophile
[09:18] Bunyip: :(
[09:18] Bunyip: i should stop making up names for things
[09:19] Spork: that makes you sound like a bad, bad person
[09:19] Bunyip: how about ... wikiawesomeguy
[09:19] Bunyip: oh wait there's already a name for it
[09:20] Bunyip: "wikilectual" :(
[09:20] Bunyip: though that might just be if you quote facts at people just to feel superior
[09:20] Bunyip: i quote facts at people because they're so gosh-darned interesting
[09:21] Bunyip: i talk to gobo about football and soccer and cricket all the time
[09:21] Bunyip: he hates me so much :(

ART
[09:21] Spork: so you've moved on from thorn then
[09:22] Bunyip: yes, thorn conversations are just weird now
[09:22] Bunyip: it is like performance art with no one else watching
[09:23] Spork: all covering yourselves in poop and screaming gutterally?
[09:24] Bunyip: well apparently that is what performance art is these days
[09:24] Bunyip: so i guess it's good we just have chat
[09:25] Bunyip: i have read one or two places where people who are performance artists say "yes we throw up and then we eat the vomit, and then we cut each other and fuck the holes yes hm"
[09:25] Bunyip: but no if i talk to thorn generally it just becomes pun competitions
[09:26] Bunyip: which may be worse
[09:26] Spork: i think they may be more dangerous

LITERATURE
[09:28] Bunyip: well, heck, i guess my project is "on hold"
[09:28] Bunyip: what the shit
[09:28] Spork: does that mean you have nothing to do?
[09:28] Bunyip: looks that way!
[09:28] Bunyip: i should have brought some financial paperwork from home
[09:29] Bunyip: i could a) research the technology i will be using (PSH)
[09:29] Bunyip: b) work on my great adventure game!
[09:29] Bunyip: c) work on my great novel!
[09:29] Spork: c!
[09:29] Bunyip: d) write a bunch of canned reviews for my music recommendattions thread
[09:29] Bunyip: which no-one will read or care about
[09:29] Spork: and then mail me and i will have something to read that is not a paper about open source or automatically guided vehicles!
[09:29] Bunyip: i'm leaning towards d
[09:30] Bunyip: my great novel consists of one(1) gimmick so far
[09:31] Bunyip: i dunno if i need more or what
[09:31] Bunyip: anyway there are 7 dudes who all have destinies!
[09:31] Bunyip: they are all white dudes because i'm scared of women and black people.
[09:32] Bunyip: anyway maybe the 7 dudes come from earth
[09:32] Spork: earth
[09:32] Spork: IN THE FUTURE
[09:32] Spork: but they are in the past
[09:32] Spork: which is now
[09:32] Bunyip: except different!
[09:32] Bunyip: woah
[09:33] Bunyip: yeah so i guess the next step is to come up with AWESOME NAMES
[09:33] Bunyip: and draw a map
[09:33] Bunyip: i don't suppose i could call the most awesome dude bhumibol
[09:34] Bunyip: maybe i will call him jack
[09:34] Bunyip: jack bauermibol

OK enough of that.

I stopped working offsite and got back to our main office to find out 6 or 7 people left. Hmm. The main reason is we've merged with another company with a substantially different approach to things and we're moving out to their premises, further away from the city. None of it is particularly drastic as far as I'm concerned. We had a meeting today so our new managers could explain that they're not so bad really, but it came a bit late. Oh well.

I've got a high-school reunion coming up in April. I guess I'll blog about it afterwards! Look out for that one, oh boy.

I jogged for two weeks and put on two kilos. I'll stop for a week and see what happens.

Toby keeps growing. He gets pretty heavy to carry around. He's also getting too clever by half. He woke up twice last night, but noticing how he kind of giggled when I went to get him the first time, we let him scream for a bit the second time, and he gave up and went back to sleep! Anyway, he's ridiculously appealing and is sure to take advantage of the fact as he gets older.

Happy new thing

2006-01-17T00:41:38Z

I haven't got anything particular to talk about but I'm "unallocated" this week so I might as well chat to my friend, livejournal. OMG SO LONELY

Ok for Christmas I got:

3 CDs!
- Silly Songs with Larry (VeggieTales)
- So Jealous (Tegan and Sara)
- The Dissociatives (Self-titled)

The last one is interesting. I told Janey I would like the latest Decemberists album but then at some point I mentioned the Dissociatives for some reason (I've never even heard them) so that took its place in her memory. We can't return it so I hope it is good!

Long-sleeved shirt with iron-on transfers featuring Toby!
Nice new wallet
Mystery Science Theater DVD - 2 episodes. Manos: Hands of Fate and Santa Claus conquers the Martians. We watched the latter on Christmas Day, then when we finished we were channel surfing and they were showing it (the original) on SBS!
Box of ten Chocolatte sachets
Tiny Teddy biscuits, caramel flavour
Mr Punch, by Neil Gaiman and Dave McKean
How to Survive the Coming Robot Invasion, by someone
Where's My Cow?, by Terry Pratchett
Batman and Robin, the original 1940s series on DVD. Why? I don't know!

I bought the first series of Millennium for Janey so we are watching that every now and then. I borrowed the first season of The Office from the library and watched that last week. I also borrowed Pratchett's Thud! and Gaiman's Anansi Boys from my parents. I've only just finished Anansi Boys yesterday.

OK that was all pretty boring! Toby is 3 months old now and is the right height and weight for a 6-month-old, yoop. He had a cold for a while which had him waking up more at night but he's back to one feed in the middle of the night. He turns over on his front and yells, though occasionally he falls asleep like that and it's very cute. He has big eyes and a bobbly head. I had a terrible dream last night about finding him in the garbage. He was okay though. :/

My ass is marvelously evocative

2005-12-22T04:23:56Z

This entry was going to be called "Christmas Party", but I mistyped it. Maybe I won't be linking my parents to this journal any time soon. :(

We took Toby to the company Christmas party on Monday! He yelled and yelled. Probably it bugged some people! We took it in turns to eat, and one of my wokrmates who is herself a recent mother helped out, and by dessert he'd settled enough that we could put him in the pram to sleep. Then we both relaxed and chatted for a bit. I had a nice rack of lamb which, apart from being a little cold when I got to it (I had baby-holding shift when it arrived), was pretty nice. Slightly rare and very tender. Janey had salmon. True to the excesses of the Christmas season, I had a beer AND a glass of wine. Wow!

The party was held at the "Kelvin Club", which is designed to evoke London gentlemen's clubs of the Victorian era, I guess. It had mahogany panelling and bookcases and musty old armchairs in front of hearths and stuff. The entrance was in a dodgy-looking alley. The owner was almost exactly the kind of guy I'd expect to be managing such a place, too. It's hard to explain, but he was kind of a little guy, and not quite obsequious to his guests, but close to it. He had a room dedicated to the fly-fishing club of Victoria (I know because Janey used it for breastfeeding). A whole wall full of fly-fishing books, all at least thirty years old! I guessed that the guy probably had model trains and emotional problems. The second part was proved right when I was walking Toby back and forth downstairs and the guy came down without realising I was there, going "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" like he had Tourette's and muttering something about the fucking kitchen. Poor man.

We left about 9:30 and took the train home, but it took ages because I kept doing really dumb things while choosing what trains to take. I should probably start pretending I have Tourette's so I can go nuts when this happens. Luckily by this stage, Toby was so fast asleep he didn't care.

BUNYIP'S PUSH BOTTLES UP GERMANS

2005-12-13T05:52:24Z

Bunyip's push ... for legitimacy. Those Germans are screwed!

So, uh. I was checking out the Weblog Awards site (vote achewood :() and they have an Australia or New Zealand section. There is a "Professor Bunyip"! And wouldn't you know it, he sucks. He(gender bias!) is one of a goodly proportion of the sites nominated that are right-wing news blogs who all link to each other and try to one-up each other's reactions. He's diluting the brand, man!

Anyway I'm gonna have to take my important online journal to the next level. It involves stepping up my game, coming in to bat for the team, getting going when the going gets hot, and maintaining a list of tough-sounding phrases. I'm going to win myself a weblog award!

Steps in this process:
1) Have my own domain. I'm done slumming it on livejournal. The name should be smugly superior if at all possible, though Australian web space is at a premium and a non sequitur might be a better bet. I'm pretty sure www.bunyipspushbottlesupgermans.com is available (update your bookmarks please).
2) Link to news articles daily!
3) Make some snide comments on the article.
4) Link to everyone else's comments on the article. Comment on them appropriately based on what team the blogger is on. Sometimes you have to go back a little bit in their archives to find out the team, but if you get it wrong people probably won't notice. For my first few updates I'll probably have to make up some quotes since I don't have my favourite friends/enemies bookmarked.

I'm not sure if I'm left or right wing yet, but right looks angrier so more fun. Here goes!

More than mere trifle
By Stephanie Alexander

Every family seems to have its own idea of the perfect trifle, but there's no need to be partisan over such a versatile dessert.

This is even more than usually blatant for the multiculturalists who oversee this mouthpiece of propaganda. We're hit with two typical unchallenged assumptions - that trifle is "versatile" and that "every family" is apparently singing its praises. I guess MY family didn't get invited to this particular club! Plus, the idea of a "perfect trifle" will be taken as an oxymoron by all thinking people, but I don't count "Stephanie" under that banner so I won't act surprised. You'll note the claim to bipartisanship, but don't worry! That won't last long!

When I expressed an interest in writing about trifles for a Christmas piece, the Epicure editor lent me the charming work, Trifle, co-authored by Helen Saberi and the late Alan Davidson, who was England's foremost food scholar and editor of the monumental Oxford Companion to Food, as well as author of many other witty and erudite works. My copy is now on order. I have been warned it will take several weeks to arrive but it is worth the wait.

Only academics get this excited about bloated inefficiency.

Davidson writes: "One of the great paradoxes of culinary terminology is that what many people see as Britain's supreme contribution to the dessert tables of the world, for children and adults alike, to wit the trifle, should bear a name which suggests that it is of no consequence. This, surely, is carrying much too far the British tradition of playing down the merits of things British."

Davidson writes: a load of bollocks! The merits of things British are played down for a reason.

Saberi's introduction is marvellously evocative.

So is my ass!

"Trifles offer a rare combination of sensual and intellectual pleasures. How many times have I dipped my spoon into one and experienced in succession the light frothy cream, the smooth velvety custard, the tangy fruit mingling with the bouquet of wine (or sherry or liqueur), and perhaps a touch of almondy crunchiness from ratafias and macaroons, and lastly the sweet, soft but crumbly texture of the sponge or sponge fingers ..."

Pure filth. The rest of the article is an uninterrupted hymn to the deity/dessert that apparently built this nation. Funny, I don't see it paying MY taxes. No matter how they dress it up, trifle is still trifle, and is not the sort of dessert we need in THIS country. I'll spare you the bulk of these diseased ramblings, except for a couple of highlights from the trifle diversity hit parade:

Custard with a tiny bit of cornflour, custard without it - even custard made with custard powder.

WOW

A topping of whipped cream or syllabub.

Syllabub, eh. Man, you've just got to love those academics.

I was going to do more here but I realised that it was too long (do I need to cut it?), it started feeling like work and I was starting to giggle, which is a fair indicator that it's not funny to anyone else. But next year's award is mine, babeh.

OMG

2005-12-07T00:59:23Z

Five things I've forgotten!

1) I forgot to put the bins out on Tuesday. Now I have to wait another two weeks before I can empty the garden bin! Where will I put the grass clippings? Perhaps I will forget to mow for two weeks.
2) I forgot to get the doctor's referral letter out of the car this morning so I can fax it to the hospital and make an appointment for Janey.
3) I forgot to bring my superannuation file to work, so I can call my IRA fund in the US and figure out how to rollover into my Australian fund.
3a) I forget if "IRA" is the right term. I'm pretty sure it is not, and that I have triggered some FBI/CIA terrorism alert flags. While I'm at it, bomb the american oppressors :(
4) I forgot to change the music on my flash drive. I do not want to listen to Iggy Pop or Kasabian again.
5) .... I forgot what the fifth thing is.

Psht why would I update

2005-10-28T02:00:21Z

It's just a baby!

So if you didn't know, Toby Nathaniel was born on Oct 13, weighing in at 8 pounds 5 and 53 cm long. It was a 12 hour labour that shaped up to be much shorter (she was labouring at home for 4-5 hours and started pushing not long after we reached the hospital) but Toby had turned around onto his back sometime in the 3 days since the previous midwife appointment. One doctor came in and diagnosed the problem and told Janey to "stop pushing" (so helpful!), but luckily it was the end of her shift and we got another doctor to do the operation. It was pretty stressful sitting in the pre-op room as she's in too much pain to talk and sucking down nitrous that's not really helpful and random people are sticking drips in her and taking blood. We wheeled her down to the operating theatre and I put on scrubs and had to wait while they stuck a big needle in her spine. Apparently it's not actually an epidural but another anaesthetic in this case.

Eventually I got called into the room and all of a sudden Janey was "awake" and talking happily... The anaesthetist, who before had seemed kind of impatient and unfriendly, was checking for any signs of pain and explainning everything that was going on. Everyone was smiling and upbeat and it was just much better. The doctor turned the baby around with some forceps that started with K, and Janey helped push the baby out even though she couldn't feel anything anymore. I held Toby for a while (finding out the sex was almost an afterthought, he'd been indeterminate for so long) and handed him over to a Janey who I'm glad couldn't see all the stitching going on at the other end.

Anyway the aftermath was pretty good. The midwife who'd accompanied us made sure that Toby could stay with Janey in the recovery room instead of getting carted off somewhere. The doctor apparently did a really good job as usually there is an episiotomy or at least external scarring of some kind, but in this case all the stitches were internal. Toby had some marks and a big bruise on his head, which was strongly cone-shaped, but all this cleared up within a few days. Janey only spent 2 nights in the hospital and wanted to go home, so they let her. She's still very sore 2 weeks later but apparently is healing well, though she is just getting cabin fever from not being able to get out and walk around in this nice weather we're having lately.

So what's it like having a baby? I think it's one of those experiences that you think about a lot when you watch other people going through it or in a movie or whatever, but when it actually happens to you you're too busy experiencing it to really reflect on it. My third day back at work last week I was creating a test account for a website and chose as my secret password question "What is my son's middle name?" Then I suddenly thought "Bloody hell, I have a son!" and had to go get a coffee and think about that for a while.

Having a newborn is a lot harder than pregnancy or even labour were. Janey says childbirth was cake compared to stabbing pains all the time, especially in combination with nausea, cramps from the uterus shrinking, and severe breastfeeding pain which thankfully seems to be slowly reducing now. It's funny that the first thing people at work said to me was "Hey, good luck changing nappies!" when that's really the least of my concerns. I guess it's something I'd rather not do, but it's really no biggie. Occasionally he has hyper fits which have no particular cause, but can last for ages and you just have to endure the screaming and worse, the wriggling. In general he hasn't been too bad, but there was a 6-hour stint last week and then last night I was up from 11 to 2:30 trying to settle him, and everything seems much worse when you're low on sleep. I'm actually pretty upbeat about it now though, as I'd much rather put up with it myself than expect Janey to cope with it when she has him all day as well. We're slowly getting used to the life changes, it's a bit like starting at a new job where the days are interminably long until you start to get used to the surroundings and culture.

Good things about the baby: well, he's pretty cute. Neither of us are normally much into the "cute" thing but we both have to admit that for a baby he's not bad. He gets the hiccups a lot and we try not to laugh at him. I think we're both going to enjoy him more and more as he becomes a bit more responsive to us and reacts to his environment.

Random thoughts: I'm not sure if kids' behaviour has ACTUALLY dramatically deteriorated since I was young or if it's just a symptom of the old "Everything was better (yet also harder) in the old days" syndrome. It is true that walking around in shopping centres etc these days we tend to comment on the well-behaved kids rather than the ones throwing tantrums, because the former is rarer and more remarkable. I did hear that one third of Australian parents feel they have no control or something like that so maybe it is a measurable phenomenon. I honestly think the Supernanny may be a hero of the age, if only to promote the idea that parenting doesn't HAVE to be a pointless day-to-day struggle. Even some of our nicest friends have ratty kids so it's tempting to believe that our dreams of polite well-mannered children are fanciful. The other worry I have is that we'd be doing our kids a disservice by raising them to be courteous and thoughtful when they're clearly going to be surrounded by shitholes.

Work update! I have a reasonably interesting project to work on, with shiny new technology that I'm actually looking forward to. Unfortunately I can't work on it until a) I get a better pc (this P3 won't cut it) and b) we've agreed with the client exactly what we're doing. So I'm back to "training" (eg updating livejournal). I should be watching Microsoft tech webcasts, but I am certain I would fall asleep due to last night. I'll only be at work two days next week due to Melbourne cup day (tuesday), taking monday off because pretty much everyone has so there's no use being here, then taking the next Monday & Friday off to go to my aunt's party in Mount Gambier. I am wondering if the state of Victoria is the only place in the world that has a public holiday for a horse race. Gobo and I thought that Kentucky, Tokyo and wherever they have the Grand National might be other possibilities. It's left as an exercise for the reader.

It's over!!

2005-10-05T23:17:27Z

My boss went to a meeting Tuesday afternoon to offer our clients one of four options: 1) Stop entirely, deliver nothing 2) Stop, but handover everything we've done 3) Continue with original scope 4) Continue with all the new stuff as well. We had a midwife appointment on Tuesday afternoon so I left work early. When I got in yesterday (Wednesday) morning, I had email from my boss informing us that our client had decided to go with one of the first two options so all us developers could basically go back to head office. Guess where I am now!

Anyway I'm now on the "bench", and I'm told this means that I come to work and surf the web until I'm needed on another project. I'm given to understand you generally don't have to wait long, but who knows? In the meantime I can update my livejournal, play web sudoku, maybe work on some two bit reviews (!!!) and (okay, there's an actual priority here) update my company profile. It's basically a CV, but you don't have to put references on it. "Don't be backward in saying how good you are...." apparently. Are they asking me to *gasp* EMBROIDER the TRUTH? I'm having trouble being enthusiastic about it.

Bunyip: "Bunyip is supporting a baby soon. If you give him money he will look awful busy."
Thorn: if any inspectors come to look at him they will be pleased!
Bunyip: ok i will take negative personality traits and make them sound like good things
Bunyip: bullshit artist: "creative"
Bunyip: lazy: "pragmatic"
Thorn: ok uh uh
Thorn: fat
Bunyip: woah
Bunyip: uh
Bunyip: generous?
Thorn: failure!
Bunyip: realist!
Thorn: idiot.
Bunyip: haha, "sincere"
Thorn: man! you're hired!

Gratuitortoise

2005-09-29T07:00:12Z

Some dudes from Janey's school's affiliated church's alcohol and drug rehabilitation program's work project (deep breath) came and blitzed our garden for us. The dudes also took all the junk from the carport to the tip, including all the cardboard boxes I was patiently dismantling and stuffing in the recycle bin every two weeks. I saved some boxes so I'd still have a project and feel useful. :( Anyway we can put our car in the carport now, wow!

I'm still cleaning the pool when I can but it's made a little more difficult due to ducks apparently taking up residence. The water is pretty clear but the floor has all like gunk and when you run the vacuum the filter doesn't necessarily filter too great so the floor gets clean but the water goes murky. Then you wait a few days and do it again. I'm assuming the overall dirt level is gradually going down, but it would be nice to have a progress gauge.

Speaking of! TODAY'S IDEA is to manufacture little electronic gauges that monitor life goals and present them to you as progress, perhaps of your avatar in some silly game. Thanks to dynagrip I even have a title: World of Weightloss! Though dieting is just one of many exciting opportunities. And junk.

My sister came to visit on the weekend and brought 4 movies from my movies to watch list! We only had time for two though: The Italian Job and Soylent Green. The Italian Job was a lot, well, sillier than I expected. Soylent Green was interesting I guess but I did keep hearing comments from the MST3000 guys in my head. We made tacos! Then yesterday one of Janey's good friends who went to high school with her came for dinner and I made pizza. That is all the social engagements we had planned so it is now A Convenient Time For Us to have the baby. Go baby go!

Boring old work stuff

2005-09-09T04:03:03Z

We had a nice ra-ra meeting yesterday to explain about how great our company is now that we merged with another company and are publicly listed. The sandwiches were good quality so I'm willing to be optimistic. It's generally accepted that the project I'm working on is doomed, but also that it's not really our fault (the 6-7 of us working on it). They also want to give us all stock options, but I think I'll reserve judgement on that one until it happens. The most positive thing to come out of the meeting is that they are gung-ho about training and career development at the moment, and I think I could do with some training. Oddly, I'm kind of interested in going into business analysis. I've got more of an attention span for that kind of thing than for coding, honestly. In any case, I'll apply for maybe .NET training some time soon after the baby comes. When I got my Visual Basic certifications, I just read a book and got IBM to pay for the exam, so maybe I can do that this time around as well if training's hard to come by.

Ramblins

2005-09-06T04:19:20Z

We got a new couch, but they call it a futon, even though it is not what I think of when I think of futon. Anyway it folds into a bed and we got some nice "Roman" blinds to go with it so now our loungeroom looks nice! And we got the carpets cleaned.

We went to Geelong again on the weekend, including a party on Saturday night for Janey's cousin's engagement. We took Pop along, he does not really know his great-grandchildren on that side of the family because they are such a clan. Stick with the clan, man! Her dad says it was a typical party for them as most were drunk when the party started and only got louder. Anyway Pop was our excuse to leave early. The cousin is nice enough and her fiance also seems like a reasonable bloke, but I hate how those parties end up as "girl group cackling and talking exclusively about how drunk they get" and "guy group just being incredible cockheads".

We went round to Janey's parents' place for a bit to give her dad a Father's Day present. We got one for my dad too but I have not even called him yet, that is bad. We got Pop a coffee table book with pictures of Australia all up ins. And we visited friends that we wanted to visit for ages and ages but about the time we were last planning to their 18-year-old daughter died in a car accident and we only got to see them at the enormous funeral. Father's Day would not be easy for them this year, but they were godparents for a baptism we attended the next day. One of Janey's good friends moved to Japan some time ago and he married a girl over there and they had a baby, so they were all in Geelong to visit.

I have a fantasy NFL football team now! So I am clearly an expert. Everyone else in the league except one person plays damn World of Warcraft so I should win for karma reasons.

Crazy boarder update

2005-08-10T01:09:47Z

MSN log! With my brother. I changed the names and fixed our typos.

Brantor!: Interesting day yesterday.
Bunyip: what happened?
Brantor!: Mother was sitting on the couch working on Dad's computer, when she looked up and Yvonne was leaning on the back door.
Bunyip: go on..
Brantor!: She yelled at me to call the police, then divested herself of computer and cat to get the camera
Bunyip: was she leaning looking in, or leaning with back against?
Brantor!: Leaning looking in.
Brantor!: Anyway, Mum went out the front with the camera to get a picture of her car, and she was about and tried to get the camera off Mother.
Bunyip: :(
Bunyip: Then what
Brantor!: There was a bit of push and shove.
Brantor!: I was on the phone, but Sarah was about and went to Mother's aid.
Brantor!: The camera was retained and Yvonne scarpered.
Bunyip: Did you get a photo?
Brantor!: I think so.
Brantor!: Anyway, the police turned up to take a statement, and the other car from the Mount Waverley station patrolled the area.
Bunyip: She is somewhat slow on the uptake.
Bunyip: So did they bust her huh
Bunyip: Did she get taken down
Brantor!: Well, we were listening to things on the police radios.
Brantor!: She was pulled over.
Brantor!: ...
Brantor!: Then she took off.
Bunyip: oh man
Brantor!: A chase ensued.
Bunyip: you're kidding
Brantor!: Nope.
Bunyip: Warning to all cars: target is inept, I repeat, completely inept. Approach with extreme caution.
Brantor!: She was pulled over eventually and the two policepeople at our house went to pick her up.
Bunyip: oh man
Bunyip: crazy
Brantor!: Mother went down to give a statement.
Brantor!: When she left, apparently Yvonne was being uncooperative under questioning.

and later

Brantor!: Aparently yvonne had words with Mother.
Brantor!: Yvonne said that we were trying to get her into trouble.
Bunyip: hahahahahaha
Bunyip: You are pretty good at getting her in trouble all right
Brantor!: Then she was claiming we were harassing her.
Brantor!: Apparently by reporting everything she did.
Bunyip: You keep being at home when she turns up to stare at you
Bunyip: HARASSMENT

Things

2005-08-08T22:55:34Z

As you may know Janey has a fairly advanced case of the pregnants. We're halfway through a 4-session pre-natal course, which has been pretty useful so far. Especially since actual labour seems to be quite different from what you might gather from movies and television. Firstly, you don't have to go into hospital immediately when the labour starts. Especially for a first pregnancy, it takes hours before the contractions are close enough that you really need to go anywhere. They recommend if the contractions start at night, just stay in bed and worry about it in the morning because you need to save your energy. Also, the water breaking very rarely starts a labour, that's more likely to happen at the end of the first stage (contractions, cervix dilating, 10-12 hours (!)) and at the start of the second (pushing!). Last night we learned about all the things that can go wrong! Joy! We're with a birth centre, which means you work with a team of midwives, no doctors, and they try to give you as natural a birth as possible. You get transferred to a medical ward if you want an epidural or there's complications or anything.

Anyway I got the study and bedroom painted over the weekend. It's not the best job in the world but it's probably better than the one I painted over. It took all weekend so I haven't been able to put the furniture back yet (we didn't get back from the course last night until after 9). Tonight we go back to the hospital for the regular checkup but should be back in time to at least vacuum up and move the major stuff (bed, drawers, desk).

So the shuttle landing got delayed by cloud, right? And one of the astronauts, Andy Thomas, was born in Australia. So today's newspaper headline? AUSSIE SPACE DRAMA!!!!!!!

Picatures

2005-07-04T12:10:08Z

New Zealand mostly looks like this.

Here is a beach.

This is inside the Meeting House at the Waitangi Treaty Grounds.

We went on a boat, and saw some islands.

This one is called "The Dog".

The boat went through this hole.

This is actually a photo of a seal. Discerning readers may even spot the seal, though it's probably not compulsory.

"Remember where we parked, honey".

LOOKOUT! It has glasses. :(
I have some photos of Janey too but she didn't really like them.

And this is totally a tree.

Back from NZ

2005-07-03T05:34:12Z

We flew in on the Saturday and stayed until Friday, which gave us enough time to visit a good chunk of the relatives. We saw Grandad Bruce twice, just after we arrived and just before we left. He's doing pretty well, though he's had various cancers cut from his face and leg. The scars from these had noticeably healed in the week between visits, however. He's got a graft growing on his outer thigh ready for transferral to his shin. Apparently he was in Hiroshima a few weeks after the bomb hit it, so it's a toss-up whether his cancers come more from that or from being a pale-skinned redhead in a country with poor ozone protection.

We spent the first night with Janey's Aunty Sue and her daughter Leanne, as their house was our "base" for the holiday. Otherwise, we were driven around a bit for the first few days: down to Cambridge near Hamilton to visit Janey's cousin Emma, her husband Paul, and Aunt Doreen and Uncle Neil. We were also taken to Tauranga to visit another cousin, Vanessa, and her new son Kyle. Emma's unable to have kids, but seems to mostly have come to terms with it and hates being pussyfooted around. We still didn't make a big deal of Janey's pregnancy, but then we never really do anyway. Emma and Paul are gen-u-wine rural Christian conservatives, so I found a lot of their views abhorrent, but it was still pretty interesting staying there.

Emma took us back to the airport, where I picked up a hire car, quite a relief after spending time in Sue's or Emma's car, as they're both fairly scary drivers. I think New Zealand in general has a worse standard of driving than I'm used to, all accelerating too hard, driving too fast, tailgating, not slowing down for crests and curves etc. It doesn't even get you anywhere faster from what I can see. It's kind of odd that such a laidback country has such breakneck standards.

We visited another aunt, Winnie, near the airport, then the next day we started the "holiday" part of our holiday, heading up to Paihia and the Bay of Islands. I had a great time driving that day, due to rolling hills, flashes of sun and sudden glimpses of sea. New Zealand's very green and would be a wonderful place to live as there's very few parts that are not interesting in some way. Apparently many people are not keen to live there though, and someone told me some ridiculous statistic like 600 NZers moving to Australia per week. That sounds unlikely, but the reasons are that you earn a much better living in Australia for the same work. You notice while you're there that New Zealand is very Australia-conscious: there's a lot of rivalry and comparisons going on, and it's kind of assumed that we're always thinking about New Zealand as well. Sorry, guys. However, if I could get paid Australian dollars to work in New Zealand, it would be pretty tempting.

We went to see the Waitangi Treaty House, where the first treaty was signed between Britain and the Maoris, considered NZ's birthdate. There's a big meeting house, with carvings from Maori groups from the whole length of the country. The next day we took a cruise out around the Bay of Islands, which was very relaxing. We watched gannets diving, saw 1 (one) fur seal (wow!) and went out as far as the "Hole in the Rock", which the boat went through (super wow!). We sat up top, which was a little chilly, especially at top speed, but the weather was still good, especially for June. I quite liked the fact that the town wasn't packed full of tourists, as I'm sure it must be during the summer.

When we returned we spent another night at Sue's place, and had Leanne's boyfriend Josh and Emma's brother Jody and his wife Amanda come around for dinner. Jody is about as different from Emma as you can imagine. Emma and Paul had talked about how much Aucklanders suck, while Jody and Amanda talked about how sick they were of the attitude they got from non-Aucklanders. It was pretty funny, but I did not laugh, mostly.

That's about the gist of it, though we spent a lot of time catching up on family history with the various relatives and looking at photos, some of Janey which she'd never seen. They're a fairly weird bunch, but I enjoyed spending time with them.

As for odd place names, not too many spring to mind, though Whanganui, Whakarewarewa and Whakapapa are all pretty good, especially as the "Wh" there is pronounced "F". "Waikikamukau" is sadly apocryphal, like the Australian equivalent "Didgerbringabeeralong".

Work didn't call me until the last day, and luckily they didn't ask me to work this weekend or anything, just to look at a proposed change and to provide an estimated impact tomorrow morning. My official estimate is that it will be a huge pain.

Something happening

2005-06-23T00:08:41Z

We're going to New Zealand this weekend! We're not exactly doing much touristy holiday stuff though, as we're mainly just going to visit Janey's relatives. The particular reason for the visit is to spend time with her grandad who is poorly, and we won't get this chance again for a while with the baby coming and all. We'll be staying in Auckland and getting a hire car to travel to Hamilton and Tauranga (and maybe Bay of Islands if we have a spare day). My boss asked me yesterday if it was possible to postpone my leave for a week, but we've booked the tickets so I said no. That might make things a little uncomfortable for me at work, but to be honest I'm not sure that a week here or there makes too much difference at the moment.

Can't think of title, panics, eats pen

2005-06-20T03:25:41Z

We went to Geelong on the weekend, to visit various people, but they were all not home. All of them! We went to see Batman Begins instead, which was an enjoyable movie. We also took Janey's Pop to dinner, because there wasn't much around to cook. I picked a restaurant at semi-random: "Bazils Too". The name sounded dodgy but it's in a nice area and we weren't trying to go upmarket. Anyway it worked out, quite a nice cafe-feeling dealy serving "French Mediterranean" cuisine. Apparently there are kangaroos in France, because they served kangaroo!

I had peppered lamb cutlets with eggplant and couscous and yogHOURT. I've always thought people just made couscous because it sounds vaguely exotic, but hey actually this time it tasted pretty good. Janey had salmon and Pop had the kangaroo.

BONUS AUSTRALIA FACT: A "Cus-cus" is a marsupial found in tropical rainforests in Australia and New Guinea. It's sometimes spelled "Cous-cous", which might lead to some confusion!

Today's Australia fact was brought to you by Bonzer Bloody Beef Bits. "Good on yer Australia, yer a bloody ripper."

When we got home yesterday we went to Southland which has the dumbest carpark EVER. From my obviously vast experience of shopping centre car parks. It had a big supermarket but the amount of time it takes to find a park and then get to the store and then walk around it and then bring a trolley back... it ain't even WURF it.

OH WAIT ALSO

2005-06-10T05:16:24Z

From Plahblo!

What lowers your stress/blood pressure/anxiety level? Make a list (at least 5 things), post it to your journal... and then tag 5 friends and ask them to post it to theirs.

1. Getting the work done that's causing the stress.

Uh that's pretty much it. I guess I could list some things that belay the stress, by making me forget about it and NOT do the work, but that really just makes it worse. Still!

2. Watching videos, eating junk. Works best with wife.
3. Walks in a beach or a treeish park. Wife rider applies.
4. Getting up early and having a shower and breakfast with the lights off (as much as possible). It's very peaceful.
5. A jigsaw puzzle!

I'm not tagging anyone :(

FIGHT THE PYRAMID

Summoned

2005-06-09T23:27:30Z

I was "tagged" for a "meme"!

dmarshall says I have to pick my favourite 6 songs of all time. I don't know that many songs. But here goes!

The Tornadoes - Telstar
Ben Folds Five - Mess
Splashdown - Karma Slave
Radiohead - Just
Muse - Hypermusic
The New Pornographers - Your Daddy Don't Know

As for the tagging bit, I'm just gonna break the chain and risk the falling safe, I think.

TODAY'S IDEAS

A shampoo company! I will just make one variety, in a white bottle and the trade name "JUST FRICKIN' SHAMPOO". I will make a killing on the male market and probably get a good 50% of women as well.

Up. Date.

2005-05-31T02:56:16Z

I had a great big jar of boiled lollies on my bedside drawer thingy. I got them for Christmas from Janey and ate the last one this morning! I considered briefly eating it live last night online, making it a LiveJournal LiveEvent!, which is a thing I just invented. It honestly would have been a fairly crass publicity stunt though, and I've been trying to keep the media profile a little lower as of late.

Janey's dad came up to visit and help us paint on the weekend. We painted two rooms on Saturday, which kept us busy pretty much from 8am to 8pm, with meal breaks. It stopped raining on the Sunday, so after church we sanded back some windows. I didn't get mine done before dark, so I will have to paint it later.

TODAY'S IDEAS

Idea #1

You will need:

a mobile phone, that is, a "cellphone".
a friend (oh bad luck.)

Method: Write a realistic dialogue about an unusual situation. Some examples are: you run a circus; you are a government agent trying to prevent the spread of a) llamas b) ferrets; you are an internationally renowned author etc etc. Memorize one side of the dialogue (preferably the side that you have made interesting). Board a reasonably crowded train at peak hour, have the friend call you and carry out the dialogue. You should talk entirely naturally and unself-consciously. When you hang up go back to reading the newspaper or something. There's no point to any of this. I talked to Lethe (dmarshall ) about it on MSN (a few days ago, and in fact the idea predated the conversation, so "Today's ideas" is pretty much contemptible lies) and he thinks it is "postmodern". I think that is code for "dumb". Go try it!

Idea #2

LIVEJOURNAL TALENT SCOUT

Everybody wants to be discovered!

I have a title and a tagline, but this idea didn't develop much further. It's still great of course.

Calendar

For the rest of the week I'm mostly made of work. Livejournal is cutting into my lunch break, but I'm too polite to tell it to leave already >:(

I'd like to see Three Dollars or maybe Sithysith this week.

Q: Why does the Emperor wear a dress?

A: He is a big sithy!

Q: What do you call Darth Vader when he is rolling a boulder up a hill in Hades?

A: Sithyface!

B: Actually you call him that anyway.

MICE

2005-05-17T05:38:22Z

Seems like lots of mice in our house. I bought some traps but no pathetically mangled corpses greeted me when I checked them this morning. Perhaps they are more likely to die during the day? We might let the cat from over the road come in our house when it wants to, for a change.

Man I give up trying to find a theme I like

2005-05-13T05:04:03Z

We're heading off to Geelong tonight to visit various friends and relatives over the weekend. Janey's parents live in Bannockburn, just far enough away that it feels like a country town without really being one. They're never really comfortable while we're there, and neither are we, so I think all concerned are happier that we stay with Janey's grandfather (Pop) while we're down there. Then we just visit the parents now and then and can avoid having to talk about anything important.

We'll probably take some relatively harmless DVD with us and watch it with Pop tonight.

I am all up in this bitch

2005-05-13T04:03:29Z

HELLZ YEAH MAN LIVEJOURNAL WHAT

WE GONNA ROCK YOU WITH POSTIN STYLEZ YOU WILL BE ALL WOW BUT I'LL BE ALL LIKE YOU CAN'T EVEN LOOK MAN IT'S TOO HOT FOR YOUR EYEBALLS YOU WON'T BELIEVE THE STUFF I'M SAYIN

wait what does this button d